i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
I think I am morally bankrupt
All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
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