I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
Randomize
