I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
So the same great-aunt that told me to freeze my eggs for procreation just told me that I should strut around the dance floor b/c I'd get picked up.
I need to meet your family.
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