dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
I just woke and had to fish my phone out of a bowl of chili. I was wrist deep in it. WHO BROUGHT CHILI TO A PARTY?!
its not chili. and you brought it.
Randomize
