And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
Randomize
