Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
I don't know what weirder, the fact that I flat out said "I thought I deleted you from facebook" or that she responded with "I just hacked your account and readded myself". Never thought I'd say this but I wish drunk me would stop making friends!
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
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