What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
No stitches, just platelets and will power
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
Randomize
