we have pet lesbian snakes
I am in a vortex of obligation.
i feel like barbie the morning after an elton john party
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
No he's great. He's trying to do "sexy stuff" for me now, which is pretty hilarious. He stirred my daiquiri with his penis last night. He also tied a bouquet of flowers around it.
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
Randomize
