Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Randomize
