I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
Randomize
