just tell him i said nine months
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
Your children are clinging to me like my teets are full of bountiful milkiness. They're driving me nuts. I felt my uterus shrivel up.
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
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