i can't put facebook on my resume under hobbies.
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
Randomize
