Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
Randomize
