I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
on the way to work, i saw an empty wine bottle sitting in the middle of an intersection. i thought of you.
i can respect that.
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
The Russian stripper asked if I like foreign girls. I told her I absolutely fucking hate accents. Most awkward 7 minutes ever
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
Who died my cat blue again?
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
Randomize
