haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
Randomize
