i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
It's like, "you literally have no idea who i am but i definitely slept with your brother in your bed."
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
Why was I so drunk last night that I licked the bar and then the bartenders face? Why didn't you stop me? We can never go back there.
Then you guys just all showered together...?
Randomize
