she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
Im part way to drunk.
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
Randomize
