And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
Really need a jack off emoji
Who do we write to about that?
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
I know her cup size but not her name....
Randomize
