How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
I'll pick you up. Avoid slightly awkward no-we're-not-dating-but-I'm-still-screwing-your-son-after-2-years parental run-ins.
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
Randomize
