wat bout pragnant strippers??
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
Randomize
