Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
Randomize
