It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
Randomize
