Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
and then at some point during the night I ended up holding a baby
Why was a baby at a karaoke bar, and were you wasted?
only slightly. thats not the point. it was a cute baby.
Well someone is clearly not winning the parent of the year award here
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize
