Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
I went to the gynecologist and they said, "you're the most fun person we've ever had," and i thought, "that's exactly why i'm here!"
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
Acid is not a monday night drug
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
Randomize