This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
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