flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
Randomize
