god damn woman. you are like the herpes of drunk texting. you never go away.
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
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