We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
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