yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
You called information & said "connect me to johnny depp" when they told u it wasn't listed u said " try depp comma johnny he's expecting my call"
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
So apparently I’m into choking now
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