Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
I went to check the drunk texts i sent last night but my phone deleted them already. Even my phone is ashamed.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
Jelly. This is your "are you still alive" text. Any response will do.
Hey I found a cat!
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
Randomize
