My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
I woke up with dick mouth, a raw vagina, an empty bottle of vodka and the best man next to me. I also found my thong by the pool. Best.Wedding.Ever.
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
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