Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
There's a difference tho. *I* drink at seven in the morning because I work graveyards. YOU drink at seven in the morning cause you're an alcoholic.
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