ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
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