There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
What drink are we having for lunch?
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
But theres a keg here and me gusta
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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