How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
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