and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
I woke up, mistook him for my ex, and started screaming. It was all that chest hair. I don't think this relationship is going anywhere.
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
Oh god. It's my first day here, I'm still drunk and somebody just drifted in a forklift. I'm going to die.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
Randomize
