then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
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