It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
It is 3am. I'm at a pizzeria with my 4 friends. The one to my right is throwing up on herself, the one to my left is crying hysterically by herself, the one in front of me is passed out on the table, and the other is trying to find a taxi and I'm pretty sure a guy is sticking his hand up her skirt. Tourists are taking pictures. Help me.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
Randomize
