i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
Randomize
