It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
It's really awkward to greet the pastor when I know I've licked chocolate syrup off his daughter's chest.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
I would fuck him just for his dog
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
One of my tenants at my fourplex that I own gave me a massive bag of severely dank pot and a brick of cocaine because she didn't have the cash to pay the rent. She might just be my favorite tenant!
Randomize
