these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
Randomize
