Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
I almost died today via plastic wrap. I AM THE REASON THEY PUT WARNING LABELS ON THINGS.
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
Randomize
