No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
Randomize
