I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
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