Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
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