are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
My dog just blew me a kiss. First of all I'm stoned and second of all he's a pitbull. Those aren't sexual dogs. So wtf.
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
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