How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
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