Telling her that my penis is called megatron was not a good idea for a first date.
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
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