Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
Randomize
