Swine flu. Run for my life!
is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
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